Saturday, 28 February 2009

  • At a certain point in your life, probably when too much of it has gone by, you will open your eyes and see yourself for who you are … especially for everything that made you so different from all the awful normals … and you will say to yourself, ‘but I am this person.’ And in that statement, that correction, there will be a kind of love.

    Maybe that love isn't there for another man, another friend, another person. Maybe that love is for you. You alone. Maybe there lies more love in me than there will in anyone else. Maybe all the things I'm looking for lies in me. There doesn't have to be a choice, love..or life. Life is love, and love is life. Love is in me. Love is in me... Life is in me... There's no need to please others, theres no need to beg for things in life. I have the power to appreciate what I have, I have the power to work for more that I want. I am what I am, and I can be what I want to be...whatever that is, whenever that happens... I can decide, I can do more, I can stop, I can be content. Love... it's everywhere... I am only as blind as I choose to be.


    Thank you Lord Krishna, for my family, for my friends, for my intelligence, for my determination, for my love for others...and Most importantly, thank you for me. Thank you for showing me that life is not some big scheme against me.. It's all okay. You work in mysterious ways, but non are evil. And what I am looking for, I have within me.

    <3 Jai Sri Krsna

Monday, 08 December 2008

  • I've waited. I've waited since I was old enough to know what I wanted. I've waited, waited, waited...and I'm still waiting. I'm tired of sitting here wishing for something perfect to happen to me. And this is something I cannot control. I hate this. I hate this part, I just want to fast forward to the happy part where I finally get what I want, what I deserve...what I need. It's not fair. Life is not fair. I realize I sound superbly immature and I should know better, blah blah. I'm tired of being understanding. All understanding does for me is comfort me for those two seconds where I think "everything will be alright, somehow, someway, things will work out"... but that's not the truth, is it? We never get our happy endings, do we? I wish I knew how to chase after a happily-ever-now. All I'm asking for is an opportunity, a push, even a little push would suffice. Just something, something to show me that I am not fooling myself. Something to show me that wonderful things can happen to real, regular people like myself. I need not to see these things happening in only movies and to other people who seem to have it all. I need these wonderful things to happen to me. Even if only once, even if only for a moment.

Saturday, 06 September 2008

  • An answer to a question is yet another question..

    Why doesn't anything good last?
    Is it because you have to experience pain in order to appreciate the good?
    Is it because we live in a temporary world in a temporary body with temporary belongings?
    Is it because we take it for granted and so of course, it must be snatched away in order for the lesson to be learned?
    Too many times, I've learned that nothing stays the same. I guess in some ways, this is good. But why is it that more often than not, change kicks our ass? I know that in some way this is meant to happen and somehow this will push me in the direction I am supposed to be headed towards. Something about "who I'm supposed to be"..but who the hell is that really? And do we ever know "who we're supposed to be" because honestly, we spend our entire lives going through shitty situations and all we can manage to come up with as an explanation is "I had to go through it to become who I supposed to be" As if that should suffice. Who the hell am I? I don't know! I've been through PLENTY of pain and hurt, and I still don't know who I am. Half the time I'm just trying to survive. And the other half I'm trying to please people. Please my parents, please my friends, please school, please everyone..and it's tiring. Not to mention pointless - half the time, nobody even realizes. So back to my original problem. What to do...what to do... Let go? Fight? How do you know when to fight and when to let it go? I try to put myself in the other person's shoes... And I say, I would want to be fought for... I would want to know that I am wanted, and loved. But as the saying goes, "There is only so much you can fight, and then you must be fought for." - So I guess I'll fight for now. And then I'll let it go, or be fought for. Kinda wish I'm enough. BLAH I've written a lot. Good thing nobody reads this. lol...Time for organic chemistry! FUN. Bye :)

    - P.S.... High school did suck, but I could've tried harder. And maybe it wouldn't have sucked so much. But I guess, Yah live and learn.

Monday, 18 August 2008

Sunday, 11 February 2007

  • 2ND TERM SENIORRR, ohyesohyesohyes. =0)

    I feel like there's no limit to what I can see
    Got rid of my fears that were holding me
    My endless possibilities
    Has the whole world opened up for me
    That's why I'm feeling...

    I'm feeling so good
    I knew that I would
    Been taking care of myself
    Like I should, cause not one thing
    Can bring me down

    Nothing in this world's gonna turn me around
    There's no way you can stop me this time
    Or break this spirit of mine, oh no
    Like the stars above I'm gonna shine

    Tonight I'm gonna have a good time
    Call a few friends of mine
    Cause I'm loving life, and tonight's for feeling...

iLoveNewYork__x

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